My name is Amna Akhtar I am from Birmingham and cofounder of GirlDreamer, aiming to serve women of colour in the UK

In my childhood my parents came from Pakistan in the 60s, I am the youngest of 4.
I was a very creative and adventurous child, playing a lot of football, cricket and basketball. I was active. I became more drawn towards playing football when in year 6 my PE teacher took an interest in my playing and was a big inspiration for me. I was the only girl in the class, 25 boys and me. My dad shut down my teacher’s suggestion that I try to get signed by Nike who was offering trials at the time.

In secondary school that all changed. It was an all-girls school and I was immediately apprehensive. All my friends were at another school and they weren’t serious about sports. The environment wasn’t active. I felt like my sport phase was forced out of me with my progression from girl to woman. I felt like my surroundings in Birmingham shut down my aspirations, not allowing the abstract American dream where I could be whatever I wanted.

I had a tough relationship with my parents, especially looking back at how they acted against my passions at the time however as a person I have always found it vital to be empathetic. Also, I must be aware of the community at the time and the societal humiliation I would have placed upon them for being a girl playing football. It was a combination of being a muslim woman playing football with men in shorts alongside the cultural shock that prevented me from playing football. External factors prevented me from following what truly made me happy.

During school, I ran an Olympic qualifying time for the 100-metre sprint. My dad prevented me from going further down this path when I was offered a chance to train and potentially race in the Beijing Olympics. After this further disappointment, I asked to study forensic science at college but was again told no by my parents. They instead suggested I open a Poundland. That wasn’t happening, I dreamed of exploring the world and connecting with people. And that is what I did.

I went to college where I struggled with depression. Being unable to express myself forced me into this constant state of feeling constrained. I failed my first year but was able to take adult nursing at Coventry. I did not want to do it but my mum and sister pushed me into accepting it. I was mortified going onto a course that I did not want to do … the fact it was in Coventry did not help either.

After a few weeks, I dropped out and was told by my supervisor that I had really disappointed her. I lied about attending university for 3 months to my parents. I would walk down the road and sit in a cafe with my friend. In the cafe, we talked about our lives and how we would navigate our difficult circumstances. It was in the cafe we made a plan for how we would pursue our next steps.

We decided to go about it on our own. Individuals learning about human behaviour studied hard for two years. We wrote and published a book that discussed what it means to be a human.

The weight of constantly lying to my parents grew heavy on me and I finally resolved I had to tell them. My mum nodded, said she understood and that was all I needed. I would talk to my mum about my learnings which broadened her mind and perspectives as well.

Everything I know now goes back to the fundamentals I learned at 18. Being a sensitive and hyperaware child I had always valued the power of empathy. At first, I thought it was a weakness but really that was my biggest strength. Humans’ natural kindness and empathy need to be seen as the best characteristics we should be seeking to promote.

After my two years of learning, we worked for an inner-city American charity that helped kids with literacy skills. Going to America was truly inspiring. I felt free of any previous societal restrictions that had held me back, I could be whoever I wanted to be. We loved working with younger girls figuring out who they wanted to be. After initially saying they wanted to marry rich we scratched the surface and found these girls had deep passions adn aims for their lives. The systems they were in suppressed their passions, and we wanted to do more to help this generation of girls.

We decided we wanted to create a community for women who had been in a similar situation to us. To do this we founded Girl Dreamer. It’s an idea that started in our attic bedrooms but now we’re 9 years in and so proud of our work. We create greater access to opportunities for women of colour from 18-35 across the world. Over 40 different organisations have been supported by us going over all sectors from tech and finance to arts and social media.

We host various events like supper clubs. The restaurants are led by women of colour and they always create a magical night where we can meet and welcome new members into our community. The community has online groups that offer specified groups for any interest they want. Alongside this, there is a £2500 fund we offer to support new business start-ups. We have in-house programs alongside connections with industry-leading professionals to help pass on our learnings to the women in our community.

One woman came along on one of our surf meets. She had a dream to create a toy that aided in teaching stem to children. Also, she had pledged to give one free to a refugee for every toy sold. The supportive environment of women telling her they believed in her led to her becoming a powerful and hugely successful businesswoman. She is now off in New York fighting off investors and I am so proud that our community helped her in her journey.

I am at a point now where although I am so proud of Gir Dreamer I want to find and achieve my dream. What my dream is I am not fully sure. I know it is using my skills of empathy and community but where this next chapter will lead me I don’t know.

I was able to become an Obama scholar. I went to New York for a year representing the UK. The idea of community and togetherness in the US really felt powerful. The timidness and reserved nature of the UK sometimes hold back confidence in the self. The project is in collaboration with the Obama Foundation and Columbia University. I couldn’t believe I had got this amazing opportunity. The program developed me as a leader. I could pick any two courses to study so I undertook learning about race, gender, political change and NGOs. Alongside this fascinating knowledge, I took courses that massively developed my leadership skills.

Turning 30 has caused a profound shift in me. I have a voice telling me to act that I cannot ignore. My eyes have been opened to what is possible. The American dream where anything is possible is infectious and is now the epicentre of me and my philosophy.

This blog was written by John Matthews on behalf of Tales to Inspire.